Tag: counseling

Jun 21

CAN YOU FIX MY SPOUSE?

Often people come into my office with the hopes of “fixing” their partner.  The question commonly asked is how can I get my spouse to change?  Or occasionally it transfers to me and the question becomes can you fix my partner?  Typically this is code for my partner doesn’t want to change or I’ve been …

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Nov 16

BULLYING AT ANY AGE

Have you ever been bullied?  Why do people bully others?  Bullying is psychologically damaging and in some cases physically threatening.  Many bullies have tremendous insecurity and overcompensate by seeking power and control over others.  Bullies displace and project their anger, resentment and frustration onto an easy target and prey.  In the process, they never deal …

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Mar 31

TRYING IS LYING

How many times have you heard people say “I’m trying to do better?”  This line is frequently used in my practice and my response typically is “Trying is lying.”  People can expend a lot of energy trying with very little doing.  The trying line often is an excuse.  It may be that the person doesn’t …

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Mar 11

MARRIAGE CRASHERS

How do you deal with conflict and negative emotion in your marriage?  Many couples either avoid the conflict all together or lash out in unhealthy ways.  In my practice, I’ve observed couples fall into a damaging and destructive cycle.  It starts with frustration, which is common for all marriages.  The frustration often turns into anger, …

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